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Do you ever have those days where you just sit and wonder how you got to the place that you are at now? As I sit in my new "home" listening to the lyrics of Jeremy Camps new song echoing through the walls I am reminded of the desire I have for a consistent home.

"I hold on to this hope and promise: There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, no more fears. There will be a day when the presence of this place will be no more.....but until that day I will hold on to you always."

Maybe it's because I have never had a house that's felt like a home. When I think of a home, I think of a place where love abounds, forgiveness is near, community is a step away, and where the promises of Christ are held together through the nearness of prayer. I've never had that in my life. I've had a wonderful house to live in don't get me wrong. and I've had a wonderful family....but the home I dream about is so much more than that. I've moved so much in the last few years that as I listen to this song I am brought to tears with the reality that my heart is not content to be on this earth and living in this place. Life wasn't created this way. Life was not meant to be lived in boxes moving from place to place. This theme has been so prevalent in my life lately. The other day I read in my Bible this scripture:

"“Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight.” 2 Cor. 5:6-7

I think I've never really cared about what the four walls that surround me look like. I've lived in small dirty places and yet still felt content. I credit the Lord with reminding me that the four walls that surround me are temporary and that what matters is the love that surrounds those four walls.Yet.......I still often desire a consistent place. So what can I do with desire for a consistent home with consistent people who are present one moment only to leave the next? People entering and leaving your life is such a common thing that everyone experiences, yet the pain of having something so close only to leave is a pain that I often wonder how long I can continue. Yet God has been working in my heart reminding me that there will be a day when all pain will be washed away. Until that day he has commanded me to cling to his promises that he is with me during every step. He has commanded me to remain faithful, despite my desire for my eternal home. Even when nothing seems to be consistent in life......He has shown me that HE is consistent in every step I take. Home is to near..........Even though I don’t understand what is going on half of the time, yet am I encouraged by the things I can understand......that Christ has been and will always be the consistent home by which I can rest my head and find a place to call home.

“Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight.” 2 Cor. 5:6-7