Christmas 2009 Memories

Annual Chicago Trip

This past weekend, I met two of my friends downtown Chicago to do a little shopping and eating. We started off by eating at the Frango Cafe. Then we did a little shopping on State St. Before long, we were tired so we went to Starbucks and just sat there and talked for a few hours. You know who your closest friends are when you can sit down with them after not seeing them for a few months and still pick up right where you left off. I love that. After refueling, we searched out for a deep dish pizza place to eat. Sure enough we found Giordano's.

On Sunday, I went to church with Laura and the after lunch I ate at Walker Brothers with Andy and some of his friends. I of course had Chocolate Chip Pancakes (CCP's). My good friend Julie was in town so I got to talk with her for a few hours. And if that wasn't enough fun for a weekend, I spent the rest of Sunday with Andy going to a Christmas party. I must say, I really enjoy being with him. :)

On Monday, I headed to Clark St. to get all of the Swedish food for Christmas. It was a zoo and I had to wait 45 min. for my order, but it's kind of fun to talk to the other people waiting and compare how Swedish (percentage) we all are.

Dwell Richly

Tonight, I got to just sit in my own apartment and dwell. I feel like lately, I've loved the words "Dwell richly." Now I know that we are to dwell richly in the word of the Lord, but lately I've loved dwelling at home. This time of the year there always seems to be things to do, places to go, things to see. I'm gone so often or am working so much that I never get the chance to "dwell" at home. I don't live in a fabulous place, but what I have I cherish.

Lately, I've had this urge to move and have thought about looking into condo's. It really wasn't until this past weekend that I put discontent aside and really have cherished the dwelling place that I've been given for today. It's funny how it was a little over a year ago, that I posted about finally finding this apartment and how the Lord provided for it. Now a year later and I'm already thinking about moving. So this weekend, with a lot of help from my dear ole mother I rearranged/redecorated. Now, despite occasionally feelings of wanting bigger/better/more, I'm going to spend this time dwelling richly in the place that the Lord has given me for now. And I must say that it sure is a small cozy (cold...but cozy) place where I can find peace and contentment.

Chicks and Concert

Well this week had some highlights to it. First, on Tuesday my 3rd grade class had 11 chicks hatch! I honestly did not think any of them would hatch. Sure enough though all my long hours of coming in over the weekends to turn the eggs by hand paid off. :) They were chirping all day in class and it was so distracting. Kids were getting up out of their seats to "blow their nose" and look at the chicks all day. We did take them out and play with them one day. The students got to name the chicks.

I also went to the Michael W. Smith, Meredith Andrews, and Matt Maher concert in town this week. I haven't been to a concert in forever. It was a lot of fun. In fact, it may have been exactly what I needed this week.....a time of just pure worship. I really liked Matt Maher's new song "Alive Again." Check it out! :)

On the Go

I'm pretty sure I've been on the road traveling somewhere the past 5 weekends and it doesn't look like it's going to stop anytime soon with judging, the holidays, and seeing friends. This weekend, I was a little weary of driving from place to place and not being home to get my life organized. Yet sometimes it's in those moments of being so busy and on the go that I find the comfort of knowing that I can come weary to Jesus and he will sustain me. This weekend proved to be no exception. I was invited up to Chicago to hang out with some friends and while a part of me felt a bit overwhelmed with the amount of school work that needed to be done, I went anyways. I thought I would come home more exhausted, but I actually came home refreshed. I think it was a combination of a few things. 1. Driving- I am such a person who needs time to just reflect on life and driving gives me that time in the car to just think about life. Driving is my Jesus time. So for that reason, I'm thankful that I've had driving time lately, because there as been some sweet Jesus time. 2. Community-sometimes living alone fuels this selfishness that I tend to draw towards. This weekend I spent time with some incredible people who I barely even knew , that were so kind to me, and it was such an encouragement to my heart. 3. Safety- I live a safe life. I am not one who likes to step outside of my safe life. Yet, I've been challenged lately not live out of fear. As I was traveling back home this weekend, I was proud of myself that I had chosen to put the fear of the unknown aside and actually had enjoyed my time with new people. It may be a small step in this journey, but I've learned in life that a step of any kind forward is to be not taken for granted. Small steps are big steps in life....and because of that I feel renewed in life at this current moment.

If Only....

Ok, let me start by saying that this post may seem negative, which isn't my intention. Rather, the last two months have made me question so much about myself, my life, my strength, and where I'm at on this journey we call life. My thoughts have seemed to be filled with discontent lately. These two words (If only) seem to be the start of every thought......

If only my closest friends lived near by and could help me process through life
If only I had my old self back from this summer
If only school didn't consume my life
If only I had a church that I really felt apart of
If only I could eat healthy
If only I felt like I was an decent teacher
If only it wasn't getting cold out
If only I wasn't so independent
If only I didn't run from the things that scare me in life
If only I could write more letters to friends
If only I didn't get bitter
If only I had energy these days
If only I didn't have to fight for joy
If only Illini football was good
If only I got to see my brother more
If only I didn't live in a cold apt.
If only I let myself depend on others

This past week I've had so many if only thoughts.....sometimes I've felt selfish for feeling this these ways, sometimes I've felt I've taken my "neediness" to the wrong people, sometimes I've felt so un-confident in myself and my abilities, sometimes I've just felt life my life isn't going anywhere.

Yet, life is a journey.....hence the reason for this blog. I know life's not easy. The road has pot holes. I know myself well enough to know that when these thoughts start creeping up it's time to reevaluate before something worse happens. Sometimes it's good to go straight ahead towards the finish line. But sometimes you need rest stops. You need to take time to just rest. That's where I'm at. I need something/someone who will just tell me that life's ok and will just take the time to have a picnic with me at the rest stop :)

So at this moment in my life I'm at the rest stop. Trying to refuel my life before I head on. Colossians 2:6-8 states it best. "Continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." I need to rest, let my roots grow deeper and soak up some energy, I need to feel strengthened, I need to overflow with thankfulness. Only then will I be able to really move forward and live a life worthy and pleasing to the Lord. So that verse has become my prayer lately.

If only,,,,,

Illini Football Game

This weekend I was invited to an Illini football game. As big of a fan as I am, I had never been to a game. I was given the royal treatment. Our seats were in the Colonnade Club. We got to take an escorted elevator ride up to our seats and the bathrooms were sooo nice and had free football chocolate. We tailgated before and after the game, despite the cold weather. I even got to see Mike Davis walking on the street. They played terrible and lost, but it was still a great time!